Number 15.5 - Don't Dress For Dinner - Marc Camoletti/Robin Hawdon

 A brilliantly funny farce I'm performing in at the end of May

Bernard's wife Jacqueline is going away for the weekend to see her mother so Bernard invites his mistress Suzanne over to stay.  He also invites his best friend Robert as an alibi so if anyone asks, he can say she's Robert's girlfriend. 

However, when he tells his wife Robert is coming over, she cancels her plans and decides to stay.  What Bernard doesn't know is that Robert is Jacqueline's lover. 

Robert goes along with the plan to pretend to be Suzanne's lover because otherwise Bernard will find out. When the hired cook Suzette arrives before Suzanne and introduces herself as Suzy, Robert declares her to be his girlfriend, much to her surprise and Jacqueline's disgust, and events rapidly spiral out of control. 

When Suzanne arrives, she has to be the cook, since Robert's "girlfriend" is already here.  Lies pile upon lies and things get incredibly confusing, as per all the best farces.

The quality of some of these lines make it difficult to believe that it's been translated from French. 

It's one of the funniest scripts I've read and we've got a really good cast (including me).

We perform the last week of May at Stepping Stones Nursery, Chorley Old Road, Bolton

The Marco Players event tickets from TicketSource.

Number 15 - Beyond Here Lies Nothing - Gary McMahon

 

And near the end of my continuing series theme, the final part of the Concrete Grove trilogy by Gary McMahon.

It's a crying shame that Gary isn't as big a name in the horror scene as James Herbert and Ramsey Campbell. He's equally as good as either with his own distinctive brand of downbeat urban horror.

Whereas Ramsey's books are filled with middle class characters and paranoia, Gary's books are filled with the inhabitants of the council estates that cause Ramsey's characters so much dread.

The council estate in this trilogy is a character all of its own, filled with people just trying to get on with life, whilst all around, the badness is like an infection that's impossible to shake.

A personal factor that made this book extra creepy for me is that the central character this time around is called Marc, spelled with a C, the good way to spell it. I don't actually recall this happening in any other book. Reading about horrible things happening to Marc hit closer to the bone than they might have done normally. People called John must be used this sensation, but it's new to me.

Marc is in the Grove for the funeral of a friend he met whilst researching a local urban myth. He runs into the strangely seductive Abby, whose child went missing a few years previous, the last of 4 girls on the estate to simply vanish. The child's father is a returning character, a gangster who appeared in the previous books, and he doesn't take kindly to people who take too much interest in his ex partner.

This is just the start of Marc's problems. There are a few parallel storylines going on, involving Marc, the gangster, and an obsessed copper who worked on the case of the missing girls with no success. 

They pull together quite masterfully towards the end, even though the characters don't necessarily all interact at any point.   That takes a lot of skill to pull off (and is something I only just realised today writing this, a full 36 hours after finishing the book) but McMahon does it with no visible effort.

The horror becomes more cosmic than the previous volumes, each book allowing the scope to widen a bit more.  Again, this expansion of the in-story universe seems effortless. 

The prose is easy to read yet still atmospheric. There are some images from this book that will be difficult to shake off.  Particularly those surrounding a very surprise return of a character from book one, and the injuries sustained by a supporting character. 

There was once scene that felt a little cliched, and stood out for the wrong reasons, but in a novel of this length, it barely mattered. 

Read the trilogy from the start if you can.  They're all standalone novels, but together are greater than the sum of the whole. 

I'll start as I began. It's a damned shame Gary isn't a household name. He deserves to be. I've not read a bad book by him yet and he's so much better than some writers who are far more famous.

Number 14 - Titus Alone - Mervyn Peake

 

And my continuing series theme continues with the final part of the Gormenghast trilogy.

At the end of book 2, Titus left the crumbling towers and struck out for adventures new. Those adventures are detailed in this, the slimmest of the three volumes.

He finds himself in a strange city, washed up on the banks of a river and is recued by the exquisitely named Muzzlehatch. Thus begins what is probably the strangest book in the series.  

Also the least satisfactory.

Peake was dreadfully ill when writing this and this book was pieced together by his editors and it shows. It feels bitty and somehow incomplete.  It's obviously not the completed draft that Peake would have wanted.

That's not to say it's a bad book because it isn't.  But compared with its predecessors, it falls short.

Gone are nearly all the characters that made the first two books so wonderful, no Prunesquallor or Flay or Steerpike, or any of the schoolmasters. Of course some of those characters couldn't have appeared in book 3 regardless, but you get my point.

Instead we have Titus and a brand new cast of supporting characters.  However, since the book is half the length of the first two, they don't seem as fully fleshed out as those in the first books. 

This started well.  Muzzlehatch is the best of the new creations, but his motivations are not what I would call crystal clear. Indeed, none of the new characters have clear motivation except for the fact that they all develop a deep devotion/love for Titus for no particular reason. This then leads them to fight for him or plan his downfall for non-reciprocation. 

From being a fantasy series with no magical elements, this book turns into a weird science fiction tale about a third of the way into the narrative.

Most of the more potentially interesting conflicts happen off camera and we only hear about them later on. I feel that Peake would have fleshed these scenes out fully and described then for us in detail had he been fit and well. The book would have been twice as long and all the better for it. 

What was happening in the factory?  We get the briefest of glimpses and need more. Who are the helmeted figures following Titus and why?  There are so many unexplained factors in this book. Given that the levels of detail in the previous volumes could almost be argued to be excessive, this marks the tone of this book as drastically different.

The prose seems to be lacking compared with the others. He's still capable of some truly alarming turns of phrase (Chapter 102 starting with "Under a light to strangle infants by..." being a particular favourite of mine - '"But you are very poor and very ill," said another voice, with the consistency of porridge' is another favourite), but this book just doesn't have the feel of the rest of the series. It's a faster read than the others, not just because of the lesser word count, but because the writing just isn't as dense or poetic as before. 

I wanted to love this book but I don't. It's very good. But the particular weirdness in this book feels out of place with the rest of the series.  It's not the same type of weird and just feels wrong. 

And I still want to know how Titus knew what a car is when I don't recall any motorised transport in the first books.

Number 13 - The Song of the Quarkbeast - Jasper Fforde

 

And continuing my theme of "next book in the series" here we have book two of Jasper Fforde's young adult series.

The follow up to The Last Dragonslayer takes place a few weeks after the events of book one.  Magic is slowly increasing, but not that much, and is still not trusted by a fair percentage of the population.  It's subject to many rules and regulations.

However, a rival firm (iMagic) want to monopolise magic use in the kingdom and take over as the sole suppliers.  There's lots of lovely moolah to be made if they can force our heroes out of business. They challenge Kazam to a magical contest and will stop and nothing to win.

Jennifer Strange and her friends can't let this happen, obviously, and face many obstacles on the way to the duel, including random curses, arrests and general incompetence (their own and other people's) and a wandering Quarkbeast that could spell cause a catastrophe all of its own.

On the way our cast is expanded from the first book, and the history of this version of Britain is fleshed out still further.  

This is a hysterically funny read. Fforde has an almost unique gift for giving a genuinely good story along with all the jokes. His Nursery Crime novels offer proper who-dunnits alongside the surreal mayhem. This book is no exception. We (I do at least) genuinely care whether Jennifer and Tiger Prawns can bypass bureaucracy  to keep Kazam open. I was genuinely upset when one of the funniest running jokes in the series came to an unexpectedly dramatic and moving end. As the plot unfolds we can see how carefully the various threads have been layered into the story.

The story moves with lightning speed and I raced through this in just a few hours. It's never less than amusing and is frequently laugh out loud funny.

If you want a quick, easy and brilliantly funny read, try this series - but do it in order.  Things might get a touch convoluted.

Number 12 - The Way Of the Worm - Ramsey Campbell

 

This month, I'm continuing, or in this case finishing, series I've been reading over the last two years.

This is the concluding part of Ramsey Campbell's Brichester mythos trilogy. Dominic Sheldrake, narrator of the first two books (The Searching Dead and Born to the Dark) is getting on in years.  Thirty years have passed since the events of BTTD and Dominic's son Toby is married with a daughter of his own.

Toby and his wife and daughter have recently become involved with a new (old) church in the city with all too familiar management.  The Nobles are back and their plans closer to completion than ever. Is there anything Dominic can do to prevent the approach of a cosmic horror?

No one writes paranoia quite the same way as Ramsey Campbell. His characters sense the horrors as often as they see them outright. They question what their own eyes and ears are telling them. The shadows contain half glimpsed visions, things that shouldn't exist. 

This builds to an unsettling sense of wrongness that is far more scary than any number of descriptions of dismemberment in medical detail that pass for horror in many other books in the genre.

The final chapters of this book drop the uncertainty into a definiteness that is scarier still. The paranoia wasn't paranoia. He gives us a nightmare vision that may well be the scariest sequence he's ever written.

This is a fine conclusion to an ambitious and frightening trilogy. The build up between the three books, and escalating stakes are deftly handled. The characters develop believably between the volumes. The time gaps between the volumes mean we've met Dominic and friends (and enemies) from childhood to old age. This is an unusual gambit which adds another layer of interest to the story.

If you like your horror to be cosmic and paranoid, there are very few writers to match Ramsey and this trilogy is one of his greatest achievements.

It's available direct from The PS Publishing website if you don't want to give your money to Mr Bezos.

Number 11 - The Touch - F Paul Wilson

 

This month's theme is simply that I'm continuing any ongoing series I'm in the middle of - which will involve finishing 4 of them. Nut not this series.

Book 3 of the Adversary Cycle and still we've not had a single unifying theme pop up. Even good vs evil as a generic theme doesn't apply here. There are no monsters or demons in this story, just a miraculous force which gives a doctor the power to heal by touch.

And that's pretty much the plot.  GP Alan Bulmer meets an old homeless guy who passes on a gift (or mainly curse) of healing.

For one hour every day, he can heal all illnesses or injuries with a single touch.  However, he loses part of himself with every person he heals.

Naturally, this leads to the utter destruction of his life.

For a book with such a slim plot, it holds the interest remarkably well. Wilson, Like Stephen King, gives us fully rounded characters to get behind before he rips their lives apart.

It's not a perfect book. There are some questions that are never answered that maybe should have been. Who were the intruders at Toad Hall and why were they there?  The running joke following their fate is funny enough, but, other than showing what a hard-ass Ba is, it doesn't do much except make me wonder what they were doing there and was there going to be a follow up. Alan's wife's reaction to finding out about his ability didn't make much sense. It was quite predictable and I guessed the ending very early on.

However predictable the destination was, the trip there was a quick and easy read and never less than entertaining. When the shit hits the fan in the closing chapters, it does so in a satisfyingly gruesome and nasty fashion.

Considering that my copy of Reborn (allegedly Adversary Cycle 4) states on the cover that it is the first follow up to The Keep, I suspect that the later books retcon this and The Tomb into the series as they have all been very much standalone novels so far.

I wish I'd read these many years ago, at least partly because they would have been a lot easier to get hold of with these gorgeous covers.

I actually enjoyed this far more than the Salman Rushdie.

Number 10 - Quichotte - Salman Rushdie

 

This month's book group read, and the meeting had to be postponed last week because only one person had actually finished it.

This is the first time I've read a Salman Rushdie novel. Obviously I've known the name ever since the Satanic Verses inspired the slight overreaction from some groups, but I'd never got around to reading any of his books. Apart from something highbrow, I had no idea what to expect.

This is a modern day take on Don Quixote. The eponymous character is on a foolish quest for the love of a woman he has never met, only seen on television. he lives his life according to tv and reality has become a blurred concept for him.

He's accompanied on his quest by Sancho, his son who he has literally imagined into existence. 

The other lead character is Sam DuChamp, a writer of tacky spy novels, who is trying his hand at writing an existential novel about a man called Quichotte who can't tell fact from TV and who is on a quest to win the hand of a beautiful celebrity with the help of his imaginary but somehow corporeal son, Sancho.

Yes, it's gone all meta and Quichotte is a novel within a novel with lots of commentary about the nature of writing and the relation between a writer and his characters.

Of course the lines between Sam's life and his book also begin to blur.

It's all very clever and knowing, but in a way I found to be too obviously trying to be clever. The magical realist elements don't seem to fit naturally into the story when they appear.  It felt overwritten and "try-hard" and for me, it didn't quite work. The mastodon chapter particularly felt ridiculously out of place.

There are sections that are very good indeed.  The chapters from Sancho's POV are excellent, and the emotional highpoint of the book for me was the end of Sancho's journey. The title character though, is vaguely irritating. 

The ending of the book would be better if it wasn't stolen from an old twilight zone episode (also from a joke in HHTTG). It was also foreshadowed far too much, and gave us one of the sources he stole it from.

It may be that if I knew more about Don Quixote apart from the tilting at windmills I might have enjoyed it more... but we will never know.

My first Salman Rushdie novel, and I can't say that I'm overly enthused to rush out and buy his back catalogue. there were flashes of greatness, but overall I'm not hugely impressed. It was a chore to pick it up some days and that's never a good sign.

6/10, don't try so hard

Number 8.5 - This is Going to Hurt - Adam Kay

 

I actually read this last week, in the middle of the Paul Auster book, since I had a train trip midweek and this fit in my coat pocket (unlike the massive 760 page plus hardback).

This continues the theme for February of reading biographies.

Adam Kay was one half of comedy musical act Amateur Transplants, very funny and very sweary. Check out their song London Underground for possibly their finest hour.

These days he's writing for TV while he's not touring with his music. Before that, he was a doctor in London. This book is extracts from his diary during that time.

This is without doubt the funniest thing I've read in years. It reduced me to helpless tears of laughter several times, and at least one uncontrollable giggling fit that lasted nearly 10 minutes.

Kay has a knack for phrasing in a way that makes almost anything funny. Some of the stories in this really shouldn't be quite so hilarious, but the way he tells them makes it, as per the Stephen Fry quote on the cover, painfully funny.

It is also heartbreaking as per the Jonathon Ross quote. Whilst the majority of the book keeps you giggling out loud, every now and then, he pulls the rug out from under you with a genuinely sad story. The story of why he quit as a doctor is particularly sad. 

Another thing this book does his highlight exactly how much stress our NHS staff are under (and this was back in the noughties, it's only gotten worse in the intervening years). As well as making us laugh, this is a  heartfelt plea to save the NHS.  The point is made repeatedly how vital the NHS is to the country, and how pressured the doctors and nurses are. Humour is a great weapon to show the absurdities and truth behind  the kind faces you see when you enter an NHS hospital.

I work in IT for the NHS as my day job, and so much about the way the organisation runs rings true. I'm lucky in having a 9-5, but my job roles over the years have given me insight into how the wards run.  This book really threw open any blinds that were still closed to me. 

So this isn't just one of the funniest books you'll ever read, it's one of the most important if you value the health service in this country.

Number 8 - Burning Boy - Paul Auster

 

Continuing the theme for this month of biographies, this is Paul Auster's massive tribute to the life and works of Stephen Crane.

I'll admit that I had no idea who Stephen Crane was before I picked this up (although I did know there was a book called Red Badge of Courage, it would have foxed me in a pub quiz if asked who wrote it). That ignorance is now well and truly shattered and Crane has been added to my reading list for later in the year (either in my new writers month or short fiction month).

Crane died heartbreakingly young at the age of 29 in 1900. He left behind a fair sized bibliography for a man so young. Auster goes into detail on the circumstances behind the most auspicious of these writings.

I will admit that the only reason I bought this was Paul Auster's name on the cover.  The sheer size of this book has been intimidating me in the months since I found in the sale section of my local Waterstones. For an idea of how big this book is, see the next photo, where this is the size of my previous three books combined.

This book is a love letter from Auster to one of his own literary heroes. Auster makes the case for Crane being the inventor of modernism in writing, and therefore responsible indirectly for so much current literature.

His love for the subject matter shines through on every page. there are so many facts and figures and quotes thrown at us that it becomes quite dense in places.  

The extracts from Crane's work, and the analyses of why they work is fascinating, and despite the density of the information, this is never a struggle to read and is never boring. Crane comes across as a naïve and occasionally foolish man in his private and financial affairs, but a genius when he has a pen in his hands.

One message that comes through loud and clear is how businessmen have always taken advantage of the innocence of new artists in any field, and the book serves as a cautionary tale in reading contracts.  Despite all the success Crane experienced as a writer, he made very little money from his work because of one bad contract after another.

Auster's prose is uncharacteristically dry, but, as I said, never boring. Despite knowing the outcome of the book, there was still an emotional charge when Crane's death (and his wife's) were described.

This is by far and away the longest piece of non-fiction I've ever read. It's a fascinating insight into the life of an important writer, even as he starts to sink into obscurity. Apparently Red Badge has been dropped from school curricula in the States, (and never has been required reading in the UK to my knowledge) and therefore a new generation of readers are missing out. 

Maybe this book will spark a new interest in his writing.  It has for me, definitely.  

Number 7 - Mr Breakfast - Jonathan Carroll

 

I know my theme for books this month is supposed to be biographies, but a new book by Jonathan Carroll trumps any rules I've set for myself.

Having said that, this doesn't deviate too far from my themed reading.

Biographies are books about lives.  This, although fictional, and fantastical, and magical, is about lives. It's about choices and the paths we go down. It's about what makes a person who they are.

Graham Patterson is, or rather was, a stand up comedian.  He's just realised he wasn't up to it though, and has recently quit. he also recently split with his soulmate and long time love. he's not on a good ebb at the moment.

On a whim he has a tattoo done which turns out not to be the most normal piece of ink ever drawn on someone's arm. As a result of the tattoo, he can now view his different lifelines, lifelines where the things dragging him down never happened. At some point he must choose which of the three lives he wants to live in permanently, at which point the tattoo will vanish and he'll have no memory of the choice.

He soon finds there are other side effects too... but that would be spoilers.

He returns to some old themes from his old books, but from a different perspective. There were definite shades of Black Cocktail in there a few times. There are Easter eggs for many of his previous books.  the Midnight films of Philip Strayhorn ore namechecked.  A character lives in a building designed by the architect lead character from Outside the Dog Museum. the writer from land of Laughs is referenced, we return to Cranes View... and so on.  he's built a full Stephen King type universe where everything is linked.

It's written in Carroll's usual elegant and hugely readable style, filled with observations and philosophical asides that add to rather than distract from the story.  It's totally unpredictable - and after 18 books, the fact that he still blindsides me every time is somewhat astounding - filled with wonder and magic and probably his best book in the last decade at least. I felt a little underwhelmed with the endings of his last two novels, but this one has no such flaws. It deserves a second reading already and would no doubt be equally rewarding, possibly more so.

I loved this unreservedly and I insist you all read it NOW!

It's available from all good booksellers so you have no excuse.

Number 6 - Things The Grandchildren Should Know - Mark Oliver Everett

 

Book 2 in my theme for this month of Biographies, and a massive improvement on the dullness that was the Years.

Mark Everett (aka E) is the son of Hugh Everett III the man who postulated the many-worlds theory of quantum physics. E is also the lead singer of one of my all time favourite bands - Eels.

This book details his life up to and including Eels's 5th album Blinking Lights.

It's a fascinating look into a life packed with more tragedy than you might expect to be possible. Yet E never asks for sympathy from the reader - but this particular reader found myself upset along with him as he described the deaths of his family.

He tells his story in a refreshing, no nonsense way. There are no bells and whistles to the writing.  He just tells us the key moments in his life that formed the man he has become, from his far from perfect childhood, through grief and loss as an adult, and his battle with depression. 

The story behind the writing of Electro Shock Blues was truly heartbreaking and that album has a whole new set of resonances since I read this book.

This is far from a misery memoir though. It's frequently funny and the whole book is shot through with life affirmation and hope for the future.

This was a reread for me. When I first bought it many years ago, i read 70 pages on the bus home from the shops, and finished it the next day.  This time around, I've read it in 2 days again.  It's one of the easiest and fastest reads I know. 

Yet despite the easiness of the reading (and easy reading is hard writing), this book will move you. It will make you laugh. it will make you cry and it will give you hope for your future.

Mark Everett has always written great lyrics.  In this book he proves he's a great writer.

Number 5 - The Years - Annie Ernaux

 

After three GBP books back to back, I needed to read something lowbrow. However my bookgroup[ choice was this. I'm not sure if it was this book that won the Nobel prize, or whether she just won it in general. But it certainly doesn't make for the lowbrow I needed.

This is Annie Ernaux's memoir of her life in France from birth in 1041 do the date of publication in  2006. Alongside her own life she also gives impressions and descriptions of France itself, it's politics and sociological movements.

All in all it could be fascinating, and many people think it is. two members of the book group agree with the quote on the back saying it's the greatest book they've ever read.

Personally, the subject matter didn't strike me intellectually, neither did the style of writing. It's written in a very removed manner. So far removed that there's zero emotional impact to the writing.  Combine that with my lack of intellectual engagement with this book and I found it all just a bit dull. At times it just seems to devolve into list after endless list of things, none of which I found intriguing or engaging.

There are a few books I've reviewed on this blog where I say how much I loved a book, but I could see how and why other people would hate it.  In this case, it's the other way around.  I will never pick up another book that she's written. I was so glad when I finished this.  it was one of those books where, when you put it down, you can't pick it up again. But i understand why other people rate it as highly as they do.

I can appreciate the skill in the writing, the occasional nice turn of phrase, and I understand the point of the book and where she was aiming with the way she wrote it. It just didn't resonate with me. A literary equivalent of "it's not you, it's me".

So, too sum up, skillfully written, but dull (IMHO - many people disagree).

Number 4 - After Sappho - Selby Wynn Schwartz

 

Number three in my Galley beggar Press themed month. There is one (now two) more but ehy may have to wait.

I've had this in my TBR for nearly a year and I have to admit to not being too keen on it from the description.  It really didn't sound like my kind of book - a feminist LGBTQ tract (with emphasis on the L) detailing the lives of assorted early campaigners.

However, it's always good to move out of your comfort zone - one of the reasons I decided to theme books this year, to deliberately force myself to read some I might not have read otherwise.

After the florid writing in the last two books, the return to short sentences and a simple vocabulary was a really welcome change of pace.

This is one of the most eye-opening books  I've read in many many years. Told in short segments, rarely if ever more than one page long (very rarely more than three paragraphs), each segment headed with the relevant name/date/title, it gives us glimpses into the lives of dozens of real life campaigners for women's rights.

With this structure it does feel very bitty, and there's not much of a n obvious central story to hang your attention to. However this doesn't stop it from being an engrossing read throughout. The struggle for recognition is the central character/theme of the book.

Schwartz manages to celebrate the women in the history without blaming ALL men for the problems, just the men in charge. And those women she celebrates had to put up with far more than I ever imagined. The details of the law that meant a man could rape a teen girl and she would be forced to marry him were shocking. Along with this, Schwartz makes it clear how women weren't even citizens of turn of the 20th century Italy (and elsewhere).

The title comes from the unifying factor in the early segments that the women are inspired by the writings of Sappho, and extracts from Sappho's surviving works are scattered throughout. We read of their efforts to emancipate themselves (in some cases through sheer disregard of the rules society expects them to adhere to) from the systems holding them back and the eventual formation of the Bloomsbury Group.

I did have some minor annoyances with this book. The style gets a little grating after a while, and I'm sure I missed a lot of references that any feminist would see a mile away. The writer admits in the text late on that she has deliberately excised any men from the narrative -and even names a few of the allies to the cause that she has removed from the story. The segment that bemoaned the number of women who died in World War 1 was the most annoying part. Not a mention of the generation of young men dying in the fields.  

I suppose male centered histories have erased women's contributions, but is it maybe a little bit petty to not only excise men from the story and then admit to doing it deliberately? 

These are minor quibbles though. This book was so much more than I thought it would be, and has changed my way of thinking on several fronts. On that level, this is a definite success.

Number 3 - My Mind To Me A Kingdom Is - Paul Stanbridge

 

Secomd book in my Galley Beggar Press themed month...

This is an odd one. 

It's a book about distraction. It's about an awfui lot of things, but they're all distractions.

In 2015, Paul Stanbridge's brother hanged himself. This book is a sort of a journal/biography of Paul and his attempts to deal with the loss.

And he does that through distraction.  There are a mountain of facts and figures about a myriad of topics.  It starts off with his research into how and when the Germanic Sea was renamed the North Sea, complete with diagrams and digressions and mini-biogs of noted historical cartographers (also some obscure and hitherto un-noted cartographers).

At the heart of it all is his not wanting to deal with his loss.  The various rabbit holes of research he throws himself into, all the obsessions he creates for himself are shields against his feelings.  The only thing he never researches directly is the suicide that lies at the heart of the book like an unwashed and festering sore.

The style of writing is longwinded, never using one word when an entire lexicographer's toolkit of thesauruses thesaurii) will supply alternative extraneous clauses and sub-clauses to suffice in its place, and run on sentences are common, sometimes taking up entire pages with complex and occasionally almost incomprehensible additional verbiage.

However, this doesn't stop the book from being a fascinating read.  The endless stream of facts and figures and random trivia is really interesting to read. There's something almost soothing about the rhythms of the writing. 

It's possibly a bit too emotionally distanced from the source of his grief. As much as I'm aware how traumatic the event must have been, there was never the palpable sense of loss that I've felt in other books dealing with similar subject matter.

Back to my fist point, it's an odd one. Is it a beautifully written book despite its long-windedness? Yes. Did I enjoy reading it?  Yes. Is it intellectually engaging? Yes. Did it emotionally engage me - I'm not sure.  Probably not.  Would I read it again?  I don't think so. Was it worth reading? A definite yes.

Your mileage may vary. 

2023 Number 1 - Malarkoi - Alex Pheby

 

The first book I started this year, but the second one I finished... These things happen.

This is the first of a themed set of books for this month. I will be doing a few Theme months this year. This month it's Galley Beggar Press books. Expect to see a few more of these understated yet rather handsome black covers.

This is the sequel to Mordew which I read when it came out in November 2020 and I've been waiting impatiently for this ever since, Mordew ended on one hell of a cliffhanger and this has been one of my most highly anticipated books.

It doesn't pick up the action immediately. It starts by recapping the story so far (with some expansions) from the points of view of several of the secondary characters from book 1. It does this for a whole 150 pages until it moves on with the story properly.

It also introduces a lot of complex ideas into the story and it's fair to say that some sections (especially in the recap) were quite confusing.

However, I've never felt so entertained by a novel where I had no idea what was going on as I did in the opening section of this.

Pheby's prose is an absolute delight to read. And when he eventually does move on with the stories of the survivors from the ending of Mordew, the book moves at a cracking pace and it was a struggle to put this down at night.  I've had more 2am finishes where I can barely keep my eyes open and I absolutely have to put the book down with this book than anything I read last year (or the year before).

Imagine if Mervin Peake wrote a high fantasy set in an alternate Earth - possibly far future - with an exceptionally complex magical system, twisted realities, buried dead gods, talking dogs, and bull headed men and human headed snakes thrown in just to add to the general surrealism and you're partway to this book. I genuinely don't think there's anything quite like it.

This is not a standalone novel. You absolutely have to have read Mordew for this to make a lick of sense. I think the character of Nathan's mother might have had a bit of an unplanned retcon in this book, but it's so skillfully done I forgive Alex Pheby completely. 

This is one of those books that will divide opinion. The prose will be too verbose for many, but I love the rhythms of it and the moods he creates. The dark heart of the first book continues to beat through this one. There are character deaths I would never have guessed and that hit me right where it hurts. Some of them may be reversed in the next book, as the magic system does allow for that, but these books are hugely unpredictable.

The ending on this one isn't as much of a hammer blow as the first book's was, but it's a great set up for the final book in the trilogy.  Sadly, I now have possibly another two years before I can read how he's going to tie up all the floating threads.

I'm still annoyed that I never saw the pun in the title of Mordew until it was pointed out at the end of the that book. A city built over the body of a dead god. OK so the pun is in French, but I still should have spotted it. There are a couple of explanations for the title of Malarkoi offered on the final pages. They're not quite as satisfying as the Mordew pun, but amusing enough. 

Edit - after a quick look at the glossary from Mordew, the expansion on the character of Nathan's mother was planned all along and it's my faulty memory that made it seem like she had been retconned for this book. 

2023 Number 1.5 - The Dunnie - Keith Thomas

 

This is number 1.5 not 1 because I found myself with a few hours to kill, book 1 was at home but I had this novella lined up on NetGalley so I could read it on my phone.

Asher is a 12 year old boy going to stay at his senile grandfather's (known to him and his mother as Pa) house till his mother finds a suitable care facility to move Pa to.

In one of Pa's more lucid moments he tells Asher about the thing living in the vents in the walls. It's the Dunnie, and Asher can see it too, Asher also witnesses his Pa dragging a sheep into the house in the middle of the night.to feed it. he's been forgetful lately and its getting hungry. Who knows what or who it's going to eat next...

The ideas in this book are a lot more effective than the the writing. There's a really scary book to be made out of the ideas in this, but this book isn't it.

It's a clever twist on an old Cronenburg movie plot that should have worked much better than it did, 

The main reason for that is the workmanlike prose.  there's no atmosphere built at any stage. Asher doesn't ring quite true as a 12 year old,  Pa's Alzheimer's seems to switch on and off as is convenient for the story and the big finale doesn't feel as dramatic or tense as it should be.

The book starts with three full chapters set more than a decade before the events of the main narrative to give some explanation for later events.  The resulting shift forwards in time, and the switch of central character felt like an awkward leap after three chapters.  Maybe it would have felt less awkward as one long prologue (which is what it actually is), or even inserted as flashback chapters later on... As chapters 1,2 and 3, it felt wrong.

Having said all that, I'm probably overanalysing it. since my actual book 1 is very heavily stylised and in depth, while this is a quick easy read.  I was never bored while I was reading it so it did its job in entertaining me while I was reading it and I can't fault that. At only 120 pages it certainly doesn't outstay its welcome.

If you're looking for a quick and easy read, there's no reason not to go for this. It has some genuinely good scary ideas floating around even if they're not given the oomph they should have. Maybe it should be marketed more as a YA book, then people are more likely to overlook the flaws (I know I would be).

Number 75 - Chasing Spirits - John Llewellyn Probert

 

75 books seems to be a nice figure to end the year on. 

I've reviewed a few of Mr Probert's books so far.  His Dr Valentine books are must reads.  Dr Valentine is one of the most fun serial killers you'll read about.

In this book, we're introduced to John Glory, a screen writer who keeps running into various supernatural entities and finds himself saddled with a reputation as a psychic detective.  Think of an unwilling, unemployed alcoholic British version of Kolchak with a great line in sarcasm and you're pretty close.

There are three stories, all interlinked, and they detail Glory's first three cases.  From the quick throwbacks in the second and third stories to the details of the previous tales, it seems like these may have been published separately at some time and collected here for the first time.  

Glory is a brilliantly funny character.  After the shitty time I've had this week, this book gave me the first good laugh I've had in days.

It's only short. Each story is only about 40 pages and I blasted through each of them in no time. 

If you need a quick and easy read, with a sick sense of humour and the occasional bit of gore thrown in for good measure, this is ideal.

I still want to know what the rude mnemonic for the external branches of the carotid artery is though.  

This has been a great last book to wind the year up with.  I have his other new book - How Grim was ny Valley positioned very high up in the TBR for early next year.

Number 74 - A refrigerator full of heads - Rio Youers et al

 

This is the follow up to Jo Hill's rather fun A Basketful of Heads from a couple of years back.

The story of basketful of heads revolved around an ancient Norse axe that left its victims still alive and able to talk regardless of how many pieces they happened to be in.  Given that our plucky heroine had a tendency to aim for the neck, she managed to solve the mystery around her with an ever growing collection of talking heads in a basket.

The axe is back again in this equally fun follow up. This manages to increase the insanity levels by a factor of 10 with the introduction of three more weapons, a dagger, a sword and a belt, each with their own powers which I'll not spoil for you.

There's a much bigger head count, necessitating the titular fridge for storage. It's not just humans that get chopped either. 

There are bad guys trying to collect the full set, and they'll stop at nothing to get it. 

This is big, daft, gory, violent and totally unnecessary. I loved it. 

Number 73 - Billy Summers - Stephen King

 

No it's not horror.  Get over it.

Yes King is still a horror writer, even if he does branch out.

OK, mini rant nearly over with.  I hate when people complain that King has written something other than a flat out horror novel or that he's not a horror writer any more.

He can write what he wants to.  He doesn't owe any readers anything. As long as he keeps up his regular standards, that's all we should expect.

This is a crime novel  An assassin for hire on his "one last job" that goes horribly wrong. King even mentions very early on how the "one last job" is practically a sub-genre of its own. And his contribution to the sub genre is vintage King.

Billy Summers only kills bad people. he's known for his ability to blend in, get the job done and escape into the shadows. He wants to retire but the offer of $2m is too much to resist so he takes the infamous one last job. 

Once on the job, waiting in his temporary assumed identity, he suspects that something is not quite right on this one. After the hit, things turn bad quickly and he finds himself evading justice and his ex employers and seeking vengeance on a very bad man indeed. 

This is a book of two halves.  The first half leading up to the hit, and the second half is the fallout. He finds himself teamed up with an unexpected companion and the second half is part buddy movie (with a difference) along with the revenge story.

As per usual, King takes his sweet time in telling the story. He builds the characters and their relationships intricately and convincingly.  By the end of the book we know nearly all there is to know about the eponymous Billy. There are emotional highs and lows throughout and we (this reader for definite) really want him to succeed with his shot at redemption.

Despite the genre, this is unmistakably Stephen King, and (as previously mentioned) vintage King at that. The plot unfurls at a leisurely pace and picks up momentum as it goes.  It's a challenge to put the book down for any reason in the last 150 pages.

There's a nice couple of Easter Eggs for the constant readers, with some non-too-subtle references to other King novels.

If you like King's writing, you'll like this. I like him.  I have 70 of his books on my shelves. and this ranks in with the best of them.

Number 73 - The Summer Book - Tove Jansson

 

I can't think of a more appropriate book to read during the recent bout of minus 6 degree weather. This month's book group book and one I was looking forward to.

I knew Tove Jansson from the Moomins. One of my most magical memories from childhood was the Moomins on TV. I was a bookworm even back in those days and no doubt will have read any of the books that were available.

Sadly, I just didn't particularly like this book. It's not badly written. The prose is actually very good. It's lyrical and poetic and all very nice. It's just not very interesting to this reader.

It's not what I would call a novel.  It's a series of very short anecdotes about a little girl and her Grandmother living on an island off the coast of Norway in the summer months. There's no single story, no real continuity, not even any call backs to previous events. It all feels very choppy and episodic.

It's all very prettily written and lots of metaphors for life happen to the characters and it's all very meaningful and lovely. It has a deep ecological message from well before such things were fashionable. But this is one book where I have to admit that it wasn't written for me. 

Sophia doesn't always ring true as a character. She's a preteen child but has chapters where she talks like a university lecturer. 

For such a short book it took me a week to read it.  I think if it had been close to 200 pages I would have given up. For all the nice writing, it's just too cloying and sentimental. There are a few laughs, but few and far between for me and the book never hooked my interest or made me care for Sophia or her Grandmother.